Thursday, May 1, 2014

Dear Elsa

Dear Elsa,

You won't remember this time.
You won't remember falling asleep nursing. 
You won't remember crying out in the night and being rescued by your mommy or daddy.
You won't remember sleeping all snuggled up next to me, you chubby feet poking my stomach and your tiny hands clutching me.
You won't remember being carried around on my back or rocked to sleep in my arms. 
You won't remember endless hours sitting on my lap, eating food and dropping it all over my lap.
You won't remember all the times we carried you and held you and rocked you and nursed you.
You won't remember the times you kept me pinned to the couch because you were sleeping in my lap and I couldn't put you down, lest you wake up.
You won't remember the hours I spent nursing or slinging you to sleep. 

You won't remember, but I will.

Since, the very moment you were born, you've always wanted more.
More time, more attention, more carrying, more rocking, more nursing, more comfort, more cuddling.

Someday you will grow up.  You will wean.  You will sleep alone.  You will no longer sit on my lap.

But, you will still be the same extremely stubborn, strong-willed, affectionate, sensitive and intelligent girl that you are.

And, while you won't remember all the time we spent holding and carrying and nursing and rocking you, I hope you will remember the love we poured into you...when we picked you up in the middle of the night, when we let you sit on our laps and eat, when we carried you around, and slept next to you, same as we did with your older brother and sisters when they were young.

And, I hope that love will carry you through the hard times.  The times we butt heads, or you complain about your schoolwork or you don't want to do your chores.

Something tells me, you are going to be my difficult child.  You are already so stubborn and opinionated.  Someday those characteristics will give you strength and allow you to stand up for what is right, because you sure don't give in easily. 

But for now, you are still our baby, so we'll be happy to baby you just a bit longer.  

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